8 Ways to teach your kids English (without them knowing it!)

When I was teaching, the most common question parents asked me was, "What can I do to help my child improve in English comprehension and compositions?

"Read the more stories," I would reply, ignoring their doubtful looks. "At least 30 minutes every day!"

Perhaps they were expecting me to suggest buying more assessment books.

***

After homeschooling two preschoolers, I've become convinced that this is more true than I ever imagined. I have struggled to teach "good phrases" to primary school children, who memorised them and inserted them into their compositions.

But I never expected my 3-year-old son to spout phrases, like, "Look Mama, I can run like the wind!" or "Quick as a wink"! While playing with his sister, he told her that "out of the bushes, lumbered a bear." I've overheard my 5-year-old tell her brother (who was pretending to be a butterfly) to "spread his golden wings". At the beach, she said that a "gust of wind" blew sand onto her feet. She also complains that her brother "agitates" her!

I have never consciously taught them these phrases - they accidentally learnt them through the stories we read, our circle time songs, and the poems we recite.

It's painful to teach and watch children as they struggle to learn grammar rules. Think past participle, present perfect continuous tense, prepositions, countable nouns, uncountable nouns... it makes my hair stand just thinking about it! Wouldn't it be wonderful if children could just immerse themselves in high-quality language, absorb the language rules without realising it, and enjoy the entire process? 

Here's what English lessons at home look like: They don't exist.

Here's what we do instead:

1) Circle time

We recite poems and sing songs with high-quality, descriptive language and rich imagery, while doing the actions. Here's one:

Little dwarfs so short and strong, heavy-footed march along, 

credits

Every head is straight and proud, every step is firm and loud.
Pick and hammer each must hold deep in earth to mine the gold, 
Hack, hack, hack, all through the night, bringing up the crystals bright.  
When their hard day's work is done, home again they march as one.
Full sacks make a heavy load as they tramp along the road.

Benefits of doing circle time with high quality poems and songs:

• Children learn beautiful and descriptive language.
• Caters to auditory, visual and kinesthetic learners.
• Learning is discovery-based, not by direct instruction. Children figure out the meanings of unfamiliar words by themselves (they remember stuff they figured out better than things that are explained to them) In the poem above, the children will figure out, without being told, that "tramp" means to walk with heavy steps - because they are doing exactly that as they sing the words!
• It's a form of exercise: yoga and brain gym movements help to activate different brain functions.
• Sensory integration (Proprioceptive, vestibular, tactile) needs are taken care of so they are more physically and emotionally balanced during the day.

2) Read stories with high quality language

We read picture books with descriptive and rich language.  No dumbed down readers, or what Charlotte Mason calls "twaddle". According to oxforddictionaries.com, twaddle is “Trivial or foolish speech or writing; nonsense:” Examples of twaddle are simplified/abridged literature, reading-made-easy books and TV/movie show-based books that use simplistic language and content, that leave no room for the child's imagination. Here's a twaddle-free book list.

People are surprised that I also read my children long stories that have difficult words and No Pictures! The point is for the children to visualise and create their own mental pictures and images, rather than become reliant on external stimuli to create. The stories are about 2-3 pages long, size 12 Times New Roman, full text. Yes, a 3-year-old can sit through a story that long, listening quietly. Why? Because his brain is actively engaged in creative work. (I forgot to mention that my kids don't watch TV. We chose not to have one.) 

We're using an Enki / Waldorf-inspired technique - we read without analysis or explanation. We repeat the same story for 3 days. Each day, the child gleans a little more understanding than the previous day. If the child asks the meaning of a word, or any question, we reply with, "Hmm, lets see..." and continue with the story. Usually, by the third reading, the child would have figured out the meaning by himself, using contextual clues - a skill that is necessary for the dreaded cloze passages and comprehensions he'll face in school. The advantage of letting the child figure it out for himself is that learning by discovery stays with the child longer than learning by direct instruction.

3) Read, read and read! 

Quality has to go with quantity. The more the better. In our house, story time happens at least 3-4 times a day:

• when the children get too excited/hyperactive/cranky, stories help them settle down.

• in the car, on the bus and train, or when waiting in line.

• bedtime

4) Audio books

Sometimes we don't feel like reading. Sometimes we just need a break. 

Rather than rely on the TV, which puts the children in a stupor (observe the glazed look in their eyes), when children listen to audio books on a CD, they are still 'present', their minds actively engaged and creating the story images in their minds. 

When we're in the car, we play audio books. We love audio books. It gives us a break and keeps the kids quiet! And they learn how to structure stories and bring stories to life. 

Just be prepared for them to memorise and recite the entire story to you over and over again ad nauseam.


5) Tell your own stories

Sometimes, it's good to make up your own stories. It shows the children you can create your very own stories, as opposed to relying on external sources. If you really can't make up stories, you could share your life story, like how you met your spouse, or family histories. 

The other day, our dear friend Sally told the story of how her grandfather took a boat from Taiwan to Singapore to find work as a coolie. It had us spellbound, children and adults alike!

I also find it useful to share stories of my childhood failures/fears/difficulties/mistakes, and how I overcame them. Somehow it's comforting for children to know that the adults once struggled too, and managed to overcome the same challenges they're facing. This is especially helpful for children who are afraid of making mistakes or trying new things.

6) Discipline using stories

When a normally reasonable and cooperative child gets emotional to the point where no amount is reasoning works, I take a deep breath, go into my inner space to collect my thoughts and... I start telling a story.

Usually I have no idea where it's going. It usually stars a favourite animal, parallels the emotional turmoil the child is going through, and brings the main character to a peaceful resolution. More often than not, by the end of the story, the child usually finds some resolution too. 

It looks like Tan Ah Teck with his famous stories got it right... almost!

Susan Perrow has some lovely books with a huge library of healing stories for every crisis, from disobedience to separation anxiety, to sibling rivalry and dishonesty. Whenever we were facing a particular issue, I would read a relevant story to the children a few days in a row. Sometimes the offending behaviour disappeared, and sometimes it lessened slightly, but whatever the result, the stories lent courage and understanding to all of us in the family.

Healing Stories for Challenging Behaviour
Therapeutic Storytelling: 101 Healing Stories for Children

       

6) Let children SEE YOU reading and enjoying it.

Modelling and teaching by example is most underrated. A child picks up what you do, and not just what you say. It's very hard for a child to start the habit of reading more, when he sees you glued to your mobile device every available moment. 

Every afternoon, we try to fit in some quiet reading time together. It's the time I recharge myself and enjoy some peace and quiet!

7) Don't talk down to children

Don't be guilty of uttering twaddle! Children pick up a lot more than we think, and it is a great insult to their intelligence to dumb down our language when we speak to them. I have observed many adults do this. When speaking to a child, they switch to simplified singlish:

"Mummy where?" (Where is Mummy?)
"Bye bye, dog dog go home 'ready." (The dog is going home. Say goodbye!)
"I take Didi home, can?" (Can I bring Didi home?)
"Aiyoh, shame shame!" (Don't lift up your shirt!)
"Wah, who buy for you?" (Wow, who bought it for you?)

If you speak to children like this, please stop! A child knows the difference and appreciates being spoken to like a rational human being. 

8) Delay reading and writing for as long as you can

This is a pretty controversial one, and doesn't sit well with most kiasu Singaporeans. In a nutshell, the brain of a preschool child is wired to absorb language as a whole, ie. listening to and absorbing high quality language. It does not benefit his brain or language abilities if he starts to learn how to decode language (ie. how to read and write) at a very young age. There will be time enough for that when he is seven or eight. Research shows that there are advantages to delaying academics:

BBC News: Review backs later formal lessons
The Telegraph: Starting school at seven 'can boost pupils' reading skills'
Research paper: Early Childhood Education: What the Empirical Studies Show
Delayed Instruction for Homeschoolers
Delayed Academics: Key to Preventing Learning Problems

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Recommendations

If you don't have the time to read to your children, I would strongly recommend audio books. You can get them as a set (book and CD), but just the audio CD will do too. Sometimes, we play the audio CD a few times, and a few days later, we leave the book on the table for them to discover. They get really excited when they discover that it is the very story they've been listening to and visualising!



Our favourite Audio Books (CD):
The-Gruffalo-and-Friends (younger children)
We're Going on a Bear Hunt (younger children)
Aesop's Fables, Volume One: Twenty Stories (younger children)
Aesop's Fables, Volume Two: 20 Stories (younger children)
Classic Fairy Stories

The Best of Paddington

Winnie the Pooh: Dramatisation
The Three Billy Goats Gruff and Other Stories
Favourite Beatrix Potter Tales: Read by Stars of the Movie Miss Potter

Relaxing Audio Books (CD):
Tantrum Taming: Blow Away Your Angry Feelings

Indigo Dreams: 4 Children's Stories Designed to Decrease Stress and Anxiety While Increasing Self-Esteem and Self-Awareness

Our favourite books:
The Gingerbread Man
Handa's Surprise

Dolphins on the Sand

Grandfather Buffalo

Starbright: Meditations for Children

Little Soul and the Earth: A Children's Parable Adapted from Conversations with God


* Update (27 October 2014) *

Where to get Audio Books:

Some readers have asked me where to get audio books. Here's my list of tips to pick the best CDs at the lowest prices!

The National Library has a large variety of audio books. We usually get ours from the Bishan branch. For beginners / young children, I would recommend getting one with a multi-cast narration (so the different characters are voiced by different people) and with lots of music and sound effects. As they get older or become better listeners, a single narrator will do fine. We particularly like the audio books by BBC.  

If you want to buy a copy to keep, I would recommend Book Depository or Fishpond.

Tips:

• Search Amazon Audio Books. 
• Considerations:
  - Check out the reviews
  - Listen to sample clips (if any).
  - Decide if you want just the Audio CD, or the book as well (Mixed Media product)
  - I tend to prefer for those done in UK, or recorded by UK artists, but that's just me.
• After deciding on the titles, go to Book Depository.

You can also sign up for a free 30-day trial of Audible, by Amazon.
Try Audible and Get Two Free Audiobooks